i probably will never talk to u unless u talk to me first bc im such a loser at having friends
"what did this man do, officer?"
"he just… he just did everything”
six word autobiography: “fuck goddamnit i fucked up so bad”
guys i specifically made that sentence seven words long so someone could comment “but thats seven words” and i could say “fuck i did it again i fucked up” so we could all have a good laugh but no one said it. yall fucked up. i fucked up because i assumed yall wouldnt fuck up. everythings fucked up
Why is this so awesome?
WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO THAT POPCORN? IS THAT CHEESE?
You put melted butter on popcorn?
yes. welcome to the new age.
Zachary is basically all of us.
Umbridge: “Boys and girls are not permitted to be within 8 inches of each other.”
[gay wizard laughter]
i dont think my parents ever dreamed their kid was growing up to be a depressed sarcastic asshole thats addicted to the internet and has more internet friends than real ones.